Finding Calm Within the Chaos

 

I teach a weekly meditation class for the last several years. I love my students who faithfully show up even when they may not be feeling well. Showed up when we were still in a pandemic and were forced to meet outdoors in all kinds of weather while wearing a mask. But I believe our sanga (community) supported us through some of the most difficult times in our history. They helped me as much as we all helped each other. 

We were all grateful when the world started to open up again. Grateful to be able to leave the house and travel. Grateful to see family and friends we had not hugged in years. So how is it, with all this gratitude going around the collective world, there is so much dissonance, war and hate dominating the world right now?

I figured I couldn't be the only one feeling angst, anxiety and stress over the distressing events occurring around us. Even as an experienced meditator, I felt all of the above feelings. Last straw was waking up Tuesday morning to jaw and mandibular pain. Enough was enough. I needed to take my emotional health into a higher gear and share my healing practice with my students.

I am sharing this Tuesdays class with you. I hope it helps anchor and center you amongst the chaos surrounding us these days.

Emotional flexibility is a trait that people with strong mental resilience possess. It is the ability to hold many different emotions at once and not allow the negative ones to poison the well. It is a skill that is not easy to master but the key is to remain present with whatever emotion bubbles to the surface. The following meditation allows me to come back from the murkiness of the negative emotions vying for my attention during chaotic times.

Find a quiet space and sit. Close your eyes or lower your gaze and focus on the rhythm of your breath. Try to breathe in and out of the nose if possible. Begin to scan the body for any areas that feel tense and send the breath there to release it. Now, begin diaphragmatic breathing. This is where we engage the entire diaphragm and divide it in thirds. The upper section is the lungs, middle section is the solar plexus above the navel, lower section is below the navel. As you inhale lightly fill each section, not forcefully but mindfully. On the exhale, expel the breath the same way. Think of it as a wave of breath. Do this for 5 minutes. If you get dizzy, just return to a normal breathing pattern and ditch the diaphragmatic breathing.

Your mind should have less thought traffic moving through it and you are ready for the next part of this meditation.

Return to normal breathing and drop your attention like a plumb line down towards the middle of your chest, into your heart space and allow it to rest there until you feel the heart expand and relax. Stay present and stay with the breath and focus on the heart space. If the heart space feels blocked, visualize a small opening with a beam of light shining through it dispersing the blockage until the heart space releases.

From this place of resting in the heart, get in touch with the emotions you are feeling. Anger, lack of control, anxiety all come from Fear. All emotions are energy so let go of the "reason" for the negative emotion and focus on the sensation within the feeling. Next, move your focus to a subtle energy in the background, the awareness from where the feeling arises and subsides. Allow the feeling or emotion to  just float there, without trying to control it in any way. Eventually notice how the feeling of anxiety, anger or lack of control slowly dissolves into the subtle energy of awareness and is transmuted by the love, kindness and compassion that is also being held in that container of the heart. Allow those feelings to alchemize the negative ones and either dissolve or dissipate them. 

This works well in a controlled setting but what about those times you are either at work or in your car and the negative emotions overwhelm you? Try this hack for a quick switch.

When you find the anger, anxiety or fear begin to overtake your mind, think of a quick counter thought to it. Find a phrase or a word that resonates with you, as an example " I will keep my heart open and act from Love". If that's too Pollyannaish for you, come up with a wittier one. Sometimes when I vehemently disagree with someone, I remind myself to find common ground, even if it is in my mind. We all want what is best for our children and loved ones, we all want better communities, we all want to get home safe. When I can remember that as I look into someone's eyes it helps to dissipate the anger bubbling up inside. And if all else fails, take 10 deep breaths before speaking. Or walk away.

In my past posts I speak of the physical and emotional damage stress causes us. We cannot control what is going on in the world but we CAN control how we react to it and how we allow it to affect us. 

Do not allow it to poison the well of your heart.

We Have All Had a Will Smith "Moment"

 It is impossible to ignore the "slap heard around the world", it's on every news outlet. I am not going to express my opinion or hash over what is trending online. My takeaway from this is more spiritually based.

Be honest, we've all done or said something we regretted after. Where we could have handled it differently. We were triggered by a comment, an event and it set our protective ego off. Our lower self took over and reacted. Are there times when that is warranted? Absofuckinglutely! Spellcheck didn't recognize that one 😂

We are imperfect human beings to be sure. Yet Tantra yoga teaches us to accept and love ourselves with all our blemishes, imperfections and faults. Even embrace them. After all, an imperfect diamond still shines and sparkles. Shining the light of self awareness on those imperfections allows us to sift through the qualities in ourselves that damage from the ones that make us the unique, amazing souls that we are. After all, no diamond is exactly alike. Being quirky, thinking outside the box, even a bit odd adds technicolor to our human experience.

When we find ourselves triggered, that is our cue to take a time out. Take a deep breath, maybe ten, and then choose our next step wisely. And perhaps recall the 3 Gates of Speech from the Buddha, which states:

Before you Speak, Ask Yourself:

Is it True? Is it Kind? Is it Necessary?

There is a Fourth Gate if the other three are a Yes.

Is it the Appropriate Time to Say It?

How do we shine the light of self awareness into those dark recesses of our mind and coax them out Before they set us off? The act of meditating, sitting still with ourselves hones the practice of self-awareness. Self awareness activates that filter between thought and action so we no longer react to something unconsciously. We are able to view ourselves through the lens of an observer, taking the whole picture in like the lens of a camera, without judgement or bias. This all, of course, happens very quickly but that is where a regular meditation practice comes to bear fruit.

Have there been times that even after Knowing my subsequent action was reactionary, and perhaps even inappropriate, I forged ahead anyway? Absofuckinglutely LOL  But I was fully aware of my actions and the wrath or reaction it would create. I don't think Chris Rock or Will Smith thought that last part out.

Remember, Ego is trying to protect you or give you a self esteem boost. It doesn't care who else it may harm while taking care of you. Ego can be self-centered and short sighted. And when in doubt, always act from Love NOT Fear.

Our Brain Needs Pushups!

 

We now know exercise helps the brain build new pathways, so the old saying that after a certain age we could not is now defunct.

New research at UCSF shows that the more physical activity we do, the more protective proteins we build in our brain tissue. The study subjects were 70-90 years old. This protective brain tissue wards off dementia and Alzheimers.

As I posted in this past article, exercise doesn't have to be tough on joints or extremely taxing to achieve health results, just start moving!

In my next article,  we will get into HOW to start an exercise habit and KEEP it. It's remarkably simple and easy!

Love is the Answer

 Knowing This (Fill In the Blank), How Do I Love the World? In todays' environment that Blank could be filled a thousand times but I want you to fill it with what hurts your soul. We become almost numb by all the bad news and then something comes along that slaps us in the face and stops us in our tracks. For me, it was the murder of a friend's stepdaughter by her estranged husband. Having never met her, I broke down sobbing, heaving and a pain clutching my chest. 

"Why is there so much hate in the world"? It was too much to bear. For an empath, these are tricky,  perilous waters we navigate. How do we keep our hearts open, filled with light and love when faced with atrocity?

At our most basic, every action we take, every thought we have is rooted in either Fear or Love. To quote from the must read book "Conversations with God Book 1" by Neale Donald Walsch, this is what Fear and Love look like:

Fear is the energy that contracts, closes down, draws in, runs, hides, hoards, harms. 

Love is the energy which expands, opens up, sends out, stays, reveals, shares, heals.

Fear wraps our bodies in clothing, Love allows us to stand naked.

Fear clings to and clutches all that we have, Love gives all that we have away.

Fear holds close, Love holds dear.

Fear grasps, Love lets go.

Fear rankles, Love soothes.

Fear attacks, Love amends.

Beautiful isn't it? Being self aware enough to know where our thoughts and actions come from, enables us to choose differently. Gives us the capacity to change our trajectory, course of action. Meditation is the birthing place of self awareness, where we shift our view of the world from "I" the ego to the selfless, to the all encompassing "oneness". Where we remember we are all tethered by an unbreakable thread of connection. Does this awareness make atrocities any easier to witness or face? It does not. What it does do is remind us to focus on the light not the darkness. To have faith that there is more good than bad, simply put.  That instead of wanting to close down, shield up from pain, hang a NO Vacancy sign on our hearts, we honor the victims by keeping up the good fight, by helping others in turn, by offering support to those who are suffering. We recognize the darkness and shine our light on it to force it out of hiding. 

Because that is what LOVE does.

My Ego Is Stalking Me

It shows up at my doorstep uninvited, unwanted and most unwelcome. I thought I was rid of this pest called ego, done with it, finito. Like a reformed addict free from drinking the Kool- Aid of self-importance and arrogance. Teaching the joys of humility and detachment from pride to my students. Proud of my ascent onto the ladder of enlightenment, only to miss a rung in my selfish giddiness. The I-Maker skulked back into my life as I happily donated a trailer full of old household items and a large turkey to a soup kitchen last holiday season. Feeling like Santa Claus riding in on his sleigh, I apparently expected the receivers of this generous gift to kiss my feet. Wow, was I disappointed! The manager of the Love Kitchen was grateful for my 25+ year old stove and 20+ year old mattress, just not to my ego's satisfaction. The shocking revelation to me was that I had expectations at all. Concealed from my conscious mind, ego leaped out into my path and unnerved my higher Self.  Pride and ego are survivors and, not unlike a scorpion, can go a year without being fed and live in sub zero temperatures. And like scorpions, are practically impossible to eradicate. Trust me, I know about living with scorpions. So I now treat this unwanted pest by dousing it with daily meditation, staying vigilant of my inner thoughts, and as a last resort, stomping on it mercilessly with the shoe of humility. Just remember, scorpions crawl into your slippers, climb walls and hide behind your bath towel. They show up in the most unlikely places...and it's scorpion season in Phoenix again.

Walking The Path In Go Go Boots

Preferably thigh high black patent leather ones. Nancy Sinatra wore white ones in her classic video "These Boots Are Made For Walking", but as any fashionista will tell you, white shows dirt. And trust me, those boots are gonna get dirty.
Walking the path of enlightenment isn't for sissies, it requires body armor to deflect the arrows of hate, sloth, greed, temptation and desire. Sturdy boots to trudge through all the knee deep in manure chasms life dumps in our path. A brave, bright heart  to position you back on the path once you've lost your way in the darkness. Finally, a lifeline to pull you out of quicksand (unexpected tragedies) that swallows you at the blink of an eye, paralyzes you and knocks the breath out of your lungs.
Walking the path is the yoga of action. Our everyday actions or inactions determine our way, change our course. Our reaction to unexpected and/or unwanted events shape our future. My path was forever altered after Annie's death and slowly my new world is revealed, one layer at a time. Life's small inconveniences don't bump my ride anymore. I don't take my friends or loved ones for granted these days. On the odd side, my threshold for offensiveness is 100% higher (not that I was a delicate flower before). Not much could EVER offend me after Annie's tragic death, that was obscenely offensive. I also couldn't give a fig what anyone thinks of me, living life fully demands snugging on my go go boots, holding my head high with a sweet smile and doing my thing.
It's a long and winding road embarking on the right way, yet it is also the ONLY way. There are no shortcuts or bypasses, those all lead to unhappiness. The road to spiritual joy is at times rocky, its journey uncertain during turbulent storms, yet the path is always lit with the beacon of faith and trust. I choose to walk the path in style, 'cause those boots were made for walkin'!

My Begging Bowl

What to do when your bowl is filled with something you don't want? When I was little and my mother would feed me a food I disliked, it got secretly tossed behind the fridge next to my chair. That worked well until the cleaning lady moved the fridge one day and my secret was uncovered. My dinner chair got moved.
I was introduced to the concept of Buddhist begging bowls in a small but lovely book titled Everyday Sacred. The monks depended on the kindness of people to fill their empty bowls with either food or money, but some days they were never filled. Plus, no choice on what they were given. On a philosophical level, what are we supposed to do when our life bowl is forcibly ladled with foulness so vile you want to vomit? Not allowed to toss it out or exchange it for a better choice. When every cell in your body rejects what's been placed in your bowl, yet you are forced into accepting it. Such is the world I live in right now. I don't want to accept Annie's gone, yet I can't bring her back. I am wedged in this corner of rejecting something abhorrent and yet knowing it will stay in my life bowl forever. How do I make peace with this? Accepting yet despising every moment of it, swallowing the bad medicine, clutching onto my soul as it screams in pain from the gaping wound still raw, I will survive the suffering and eventually heal. Through meditation and yoga, acceptance will coat rejection with the nectar of higher goodness. My begging bowl still has room for sweetness, love and peace.
May your begging bowl always be filled with all that you need and is good in this world.           

Hope Floats

Martin Luther King's birthday just passed and I mused on how close to the new year it falls. When I think of Mr. King, the word "hope" always filters to the top. Hope permeates the air in January like the scent of my blossoming tangelo in springtime. After all, New Year's resolutions need a good sprinkling of hope to manifest themselves. So I am pondering the word hope. When we anchor hope onto our dreams, expectations or accomplishments, it not only gives them a sense of lightness or buoyancy but density as well. When we hope for a better life situation in the new year, it adds a weighty quality to our desire. There is a responsibility to take practical steps towards that goal, not just a wistful desire that our future improve. Turning hope into reality is an intense proposition. In my view, hope carries a lot of weight, yet is light to carry. It is that airy, souffle-like quality that I am focusing on this year. How can I lighten the load or burden of procuring myself a better life and not feel as if the weight of the world is on my shoulders? Every morning prior to meditation, I now ask myself what brought me happiness yesterday: a peaceful hike with my Australian Shepherd, the deep tissue massage I scheduled in the afternoon (a Christmas gift from my hubby). Then I ask what will bring me happiness that day, and think of at least one joyful experience yet to come. It may be as simple as watching a movie with my husband or enjoying a good meal with friends that coming evening. Remembering how important joy is in our daily lives keeps hope afloat within our hearts. Here is a fun question I asked my yoga students: If hope were a food, what food would it be for you? I visualize a light, airy chocolate mousse, with an intensely pure cocoa taste. Something so light on the tongue, yet exploding with flavor on the palate. I received some unexpected responses, from spinach to alfalfa sprouts, even bananas! There is no right or wrong food choice, I just felt dessert was way more fun! Share your choice in the comments section, I'd love to know. Hope props us up and helps carry us above the challenges placed before us. May your burdens be light and your joys many this upcoming year.

Ring In, Toss Out.

This new year is the year I look towards what I want, not back on what I don't want. Say what, you ask? Instead of focusing my energy on negative patterns I want to change, zero in on the positive trends I'm starting. One of my favorite films is from the 1970's titled "The Gumball Rally" starring a young, handsome Raul Julia as an Italian race car driver. The story is about a handful of car enthusiasts and their yearly illegal race across the country. As Raul Julias' character steps into his Alfa Romeo, he grabs a hold of the rear view mirror and states: (insert Italian accent here)"What is behind us is not important!" and yanks the mirror off, tossing it into the backseat. Fabuloso! In life, what is in our past should stay there. Notice it become smaller as you move forward down the superhighway of life. Travel light carrying only what you need. The new year is as good a time as any to assess our needs, wants, desires and hopes. The more "needs", the more luggage you haul. One of my New Year's intentions is about conquering fear, fear of the future, of failing, of not achieving my full potential as a human being, fear of falling (on my head, that is, in pincha mayurasana-forearm stand). Tall order. And yet, my path towards less fear is by heading straight into it. Forgetting about past failed attempts at the above entreaties, tossing out the rear view mirror, and heading down the road pedal to the metal no speed limit in sight. I realize the only obstacle in my path is myself, I'm the one with invisible constraints on my future. How to bypass that? Distinguish between true fear and imprinted fear. True fear is flying at 120mph well beyond my driving skills, imprinted fear is speeding up to 30mph beyond my comfortable driving speed. A bit frightful, adrenaline going, but not really dangerous. And without a rear view mirror I won't steal glimpses at it for those dreaded flashing red and blue lights. I'll just keep moving ahead until I reach the finish line. With a new year comes new beginnings, renewed hopes. May yours be guided by an open heart and an open mind as you reach for your goals.

What Are You Grateful For?

Thanksgiving Day is upon us and gratitude is the word that bubbles to the surface of my consciousness. Grateful for every single moment of my silly life. I take so many moments for granted, such as my ability to hike a mountain, gaze at a rainbow sherbet sunset as I'm stuck in rush hour traffic, take in the melodious singing of competing songbirds in my garden, conversing with a good friend, laughing and playing with my young nephews, sharing a delicious meal. I am in deep gratitude for a healthy body and mind and for all the gifts I've been bestowed that money can't buy. I am grateful to each and every one of you for your friendship, love and kindness. May tomorrow truly be a day of thankfulness for all of you.

Mamma Mia! Here I Go Again

Yes, it's a musical. With ABBA music. I omitted both of those facts when my husband asked what the movie we were about to watch, Mamma Mia!, was about. "It's a comedy, honey", I sweetly replied. By the time he figured out there was dancing AND singing at the same time, it was too late. He abhors musicals. If I ever want to torture him, I'll tie him to a chair and force him to watch "The Sound of Music" repeatedly. But I digress. The 70's were big. Big on everything. Sequined jumpsuits w/bell bottoms wide enough to hide a family of squirrels. Platform shoes for wading through rice paddies. Cars that could double as boats, and larger than some New York apartments. It was fabulous! Why am I blogging about this? Because of one scene. Forget the decadence of a Greek island setting, Meryl Streep singing her heart out and Pierce Brosnan bravely crooning onscreen. The girls on the bed jumping and hopping captured my heart. When is the last time you jumped up and down on a bed? Let your inner child go wild? Threw caution and propriety out the window and set yourself free? Our souls need to express their silly side as well as their introspective one. Life is way too serious these days. Bounce a yo-yo, throw a Frisbee, lick a Popsicle, chase your friend with a remote control car, shoot silly string at each other, blow bubbles, and don't forget to jump on the bed! Most importantly, laugh and forget your worries.

In 30 Seconds, You're Homeless

The sound and force of a freight train plows through your home at 165MPH, levels it and as quickly as it showed up the train leaves. Within seconds your life is changed, your belongings strewn for miles, it's dark, raining and you are homeless. Except it's not a freight train that ripped away your home, it was an F3 tornado. This is what happened in Millbury, Ohio recently. My girlfriend Sue lives in the neighboring town and the twister roared by a half mile from her home. After viewing the devastating pictures of the damage, I am eternally grateful she and her family are safe. Now it is time to grieve for the dead and help those who were injured or left homeless. Those who were lucky enough to escape the wrath of the twister are left to grapple with an array of emotions: relief, sadness, guilt, grief among others. Tornadoes are especially cruel when weighed against other natural disasters. They are selective on what they destroy. Just view the pictures of Millbury and see. One home is intact and the next door home is flattened to the ground. It is that indiscriminate characteristic of tornadoes that leads to the inevitable question: "Why me?" Is it a matter of luck, fate, God's will? It's none of those, of course. No matter how carefully we craft our lives, plan and organize them, life happens. There is a saying that states "Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans". If the raw power of nature teaches us anything, it is that we do not have complete control over our lives. We are at the mercy of the unknown. Sometimes bad things just happen for no reason, not because of superstition, religion, punishment, karma or whatever other label our subconscious tries to slap on it. Accepting that the universe is chaotic and at times without rhyme or reason, is a concept I am coming to terms with. There is one word that sums up how to deal with the uncertainty life throws at us: Grace. And that is how the wonderful people of Millbury and surrounding areas are handling this disaster, with grace. To make a donation to the Toledo Red Cross Chapter, click here.

Lighten Your Load

Ever notice how some people are constantly looking back? They live in coulda, woulda, shoulda land? Living in the past and wishing they'd done..whatever they didn't do? Don't you just want to scream "snap out of it!" I mean, who cares? Alright, my rant is over, whew, I feel better. If we are constantly looking back we will miss what is ahead and either, lose out on an opportunity, or hit a light pole. Don't get me wrong, we need to learn from our mistakes but why flog ourselves over it? Maybe I am missing that regret gene. Not being the most impulsive human probably eases the lack of regret. Not that I don't think being impulsive is fun, I've jumped into plenty of fountains in my time and even clambered over the balcony of a 9th story building once (to my defense I was only 10 and stupidly lucky). But regret is a waste of mind time and a depressant at that. Kicking old habits is not for the faint of heart, but kicking regret out of your consciousness will release you from your past. How to start? As one who lacks the regret gene, I can only speak from my personal vault. Think through major decisions and gather all the facts before jumping in. Apply the Golden Rule to EVERY action or inaction you take. Sprinkle kindness, patience and compassion on every person you encounter (even if it is not reciprocated). Live with passion yet restraint and see what lies ahead.

Flip It Over

Back in the days of records (those round, ebony, circular disks with grooves that play tunes), you'd flip it over to side B for the other half. That side was usually reserved for the lesser known tracks and didn't get played as much. Hence, the speed of light invention of eight track tapes, which didn't need flipping. They did, however, take a ton of space in my 1981 Mustang center console. But I digress. The universe is sending people my way lately who, against their better judgement, believe I can help them. I'm a good listener, give advice when asked, and for the most part, have clarity of thought. In other words, I'm others' sounding board. I don't mind. At a young age peers would come to me for advice and it's been ongoing. I should have become a psychologist as my husband points out, but I didn't want to listen to other people's problems at work AND on my off time. A wise yoga teacher presented me with the concept of flipping over an unsavory situation. When I find myself with a problem, I try the flip side. What positive aspect can I take out of this? If I am going to suffer, which I truly dislike, I might as well learn something. Say you've experienced a life changing situation (divorce, unemployment) and feel like a deer in headlights. Paralyzed by the floor falling away beneath your feet. I see it as an opportunity to start over with a new life. Move to a new city (my choice is Lake Tahoe), go back to school and reinvent yourself. Flip yourself over and explore side B. **Disclaimer- No, I am not getting divorced or unemployed, although being in real estate these days is kinda close.

Where's Your Horizon?

One of the many things I love about the beach is my ability to spot the horizon anytime. There's something reassuring about gazing at the end of the earth, at least visually. Akin to venturing out on a new hiking trail and finally reaching that peak or rushing waterfall, there's a reward for the tired muscles and pounding heart. Yeah, I know life is supposed to be about the journey not the destination (yada, yada, yada), but we really do need to set the destination, even if it's vague or existentialist. Goals, no matter how long-term or small, keep us on the path. We may veer off a side trail and check out the duck pond, but to reach our destination we will hop back on the main route. Otherwise, we could lose our way and wind up on unmarked, rogue trails. And although the journey will be great, darkness may fall and we'll be stranded. Many of us are wondering how we wound up in the thick of this recession, and for many I know, it's a depression, both economic and emotional. Stopped in their tracks, they don't know which trail to take next. We need to reset our GPS and find a new horizon. Keep looking ahead and mind the trail signs to stay on track.

Why Postpone Joy?

I mesmerisingly stare at these words sparkling in rhinestones on a petite woman's t-shirt, and my mind stops in its tracks. Wow, great question I tell myself, and how do you answer that? The white elephant in the room answer is of course, you don't. So why do we postpone joy? That is the deeper question we each must self reflect on. My answer was duty. The duty to work to make money and pay bills. The duty to keep my home from becoming a pig sty, even though I loathe cleaning. The duty to lift weights to stave off the inevitable decay of my muscles from old age. It's the "have to" chores in my life that sometimes postpone my joy, or so I suppose. Maybe it's the attitude with which I approach these duties that needs to shift. What if I find joy in my duties instead? I'm working towards it. I now listen to NPR while the pungent smell of white vinegar wafts up my nostrils. I may as well get smarter while mopping the floors. Finding joy in real estate these days is a bit challenging, but I love my other job, teaching yoga. Paying off bills will give me peace of mind and take a load off, so there is joy in that. Lifting weights? Hmm, maybe if I were narcissistic I could admire the cut muscles on my arms, but it really doesn't do anything for me. I would just as gladly take a pill, or eat spinach. Finding joy requires looking within and shedding habits that no longer serve us, adopting new ones and finding the sparkle (tejase) in all that we do.

The Key to Less Stress

A fellow yoga teacher commented that every door she encounters is shut and then utters something about Mercury being in retrograde. I have no idea what that means, but I gather 'tis not good. The closed doors did peak my interest, however. Mulling the idea over, everything does seem harder than usual. When times were good, doors would open before me like magic. Now, I knock on the door and there's nobody home. I produce my master key ring set, and proceed to insert each key to no avail. Maybe I'm at the wrong doorway. Instead of forcing our way through a situation that we believe should be, perhaps we ARE at the wrong house. What if we just followed the natural flow of life and moved on to the next threshold? Or returned to that same portal at another time? Would the results be different? Would a separate point in the continuum of space produce an altered reality? After all, no two moments are the same. The very root of Taoism is going with the flow of life, not forcing anything. Westernized thinking muddies up clarity of thought with too much action or movement. Possibly, just possibly, the key to open pathways is allowing them to open before us when we are meant to pass through them. And wait for Mercury to stop being in retrograde.

Are the Flying Monkeys Chasing You?

There are weeks I feel the Wicked Witch of the West is relentlessly chasing me around with those flying monkeys of hers. I swat them away but they continue to be on my back. Surrendering to the green-faced evil one is no option in my book, but there are times I am tired of running! What if Dorothy hadn't run away? She would have been safely tucked in the storm cellar and had no adventures at all. How boring. Many of us took calculated risks to boost our retirement savings or advance our financial nest eggs and got caught in this economic down spiraling tornado. Hindsight is 20/20 and perhaps we would rethink some of our choices, but the only regrets you have in life are the risks you didn't take. Yes, didn't take. I personally don't believe in regret, so I do wander outside of the farm every once in a while to check out Kansas (the world).

Would I change some of my past choices? Absolutely, but I made the decisions at the time with all the information I had, and not knowing any wizards, could not read the future. So I will keep trekking to Oz and dreaming of multi-color changing horses. Just watch out for the flying monkeys!

Understanding Shiva's Dance

I experienced two of the five acts of Shiva last week. A path opened before me, all the pieces fell into place, and feeling pretty good (read ego) about following my intuitive self, headed off skipping happily down the path. Unexpectedly, an obstacle got thrown right in my way. I was confused and blindsided, as I was sure the signs of karma had led me here and could not understand the derailing. Instead of reacting with anger or frustration though, I chose to wait. Wait for the purpose of the obstacle to be revealed. The challenge, apart from corking my ego like an unhappy genie in a bottle, was to be patient and have trust while the reason was concealed from me. As the obstacle lifted, an unexpected gift came with it. Smiling inwardly, I understood the reason for the concealment and the lesson learned when the time for revealment came. I learned that life's bumps, potholes, detours and delays are there to teach us patience and trust. The patience to not overreact and trust in the unknown (the unrevealed). The unknown will reveal itself when it is ready.

Our lives are in a constant flow of concealment and revealment. Awareness helps us become more in touch with the natural pulsation of life (prana). As the dark side of the moon reveals itself unhurried, we can wait in the darkness armed with trust and patience knowing the light will reveal our path in due time.

It's Dark, Damp, with Screaming Bats!

Well, there are bats in my tunnel. It adds to the drama. Although this is a serious subject, humor and laughter are great destressors!

We all have moments or events in our lives we don't want to experience. We have no control or choice but to plow through the crisis. A job loss, unexpected health issue, death in the family... These acute stress events usually blindside us and throw us off our axis. One way to relieve the anxiety is to process the life changing circumstance through visual imagery. It is one of the methods I use to help me accept a difficult situation. It is my true desire that it benefits you as well.

I visualize myself standing, facing a one-way tunnel on the side of a high mountain range, like the Alps. I can't turn around, it's impossible for me to bypass the tunnel and realize I have to go through it. I know there is an end to the tunnel and there is light on the other side. I just don't know what will happen in the tunnel (here is where my bats come in) or how long it is. I take a deep breath, muster all my courage, shed my fears (as I know bats smell fear), and step into the darkness. The only motivation that keeps me walking down the tunnel is knowing there is another side. I don't know what's there waiting for me, but I do know there will be light, in the form of revealment, resolution, acceptance and knowledge.

Now, if I could just find that bat repellent spray...