Flip It Over

Back in the days of records (those round, ebony, circular disks with grooves that play tunes), you'd flip it over to side B for the other half. That side was usually reserved for the lesser known tracks and didn't get played as much. Hence, the speed of light invention of eight track tapes, which didn't need flipping. They did, however, take a ton of space in my 1981 Mustang center console. But I digress. The universe is sending people my way lately who, against their better judgement, believe I can help them. I'm a good listener, give advice when asked, and for the most part, have clarity of thought. In other words, I'm others' sounding board. I don't mind. At a young age peers would come to me for advice and it's been ongoing. I should have become a psychologist as my husband points out, but I didn't want to listen to other people's problems at work AND on my off time. A wise yoga teacher presented me with the concept of flipping over an unsavory situation. When I find myself with a problem, I try the flip side. What positive aspect can I take out of this? If I am going to suffer, which I truly dislike, I might as well learn something. Say you've experienced a life changing situation (divorce, unemployment) and feel like a deer in headlights. Paralyzed by the floor falling away beneath your feet. I see it as an opportunity to start over with a new life. Move to a new city (my choice is Lake Tahoe), go back to school and reinvent yourself. Flip yourself over and explore side B. **Disclaimer- No, I am not getting divorced or unemployed, although being in real estate these days is kinda close.

Where's Your Horizon?

One of the many things I love about the beach is my ability to spot the horizon anytime. There's something reassuring about gazing at the end of the earth, at least visually. Akin to venturing out on a new hiking trail and finally reaching that peak or rushing waterfall, there's a reward for the tired muscles and pounding heart. Yeah, I know life is supposed to be about the journey not the destination (yada, yada, yada), but we really do need to set the destination, even if it's vague or existentialist. Goals, no matter how long-term or small, keep us on the path. We may veer off a side trail and check out the duck pond, but to reach our destination we will hop back on the main route. Otherwise, we could lose our way and wind up on unmarked, rogue trails. And although the journey will be great, darkness may fall and we'll be stranded. Many of us are wondering how we wound up in the thick of this recession, and for many I know, it's a depression, both economic and emotional. Stopped in their tracks, they don't know which trail to take next. We need to reset our GPS and find a new horizon. Keep looking ahead and mind the trail signs to stay on track.

Why Postpone Joy?

I mesmerisingly stare at these words sparkling in rhinestones on a petite woman's t-shirt, and my mind stops in its tracks. Wow, great question I tell myself, and how do you answer that? The white elephant in the room answer is of course, you don't. So why do we postpone joy? That is the deeper question we each must self reflect on. My answer was duty. The duty to work to make money and pay bills. The duty to keep my home from becoming a pig sty, even though I loathe cleaning. The duty to lift weights to stave off the inevitable decay of my muscles from old age. It's the "have to" chores in my life that sometimes postpone my joy, or so I suppose. Maybe it's the attitude with which I approach these duties that needs to shift. What if I find joy in my duties instead? I'm working towards it. I now listen to NPR while the pungent smell of white vinegar wafts up my nostrils. I may as well get smarter while mopping the floors. Finding joy in real estate these days is a bit challenging, but I love my other job, teaching yoga. Paying off bills will give me peace of mind and take a load off, so there is joy in that. Lifting weights? Hmm, maybe if I were narcissistic I could admire the cut muscles on my arms, but it really doesn't do anything for me. I would just as gladly take a pill, or eat spinach. Finding joy requires looking within and shedding habits that no longer serve us, adopting new ones and finding the sparkle (tejase) in all that we do.

Forget Resolutions This New Year

I am banishing the word resolution and replacing it with intention. Doesn't it sound better already? I find resolution to be too stringent and even dictatorial. I felt guilty (leftover Catholic syndrome) when one of my plethora of New Year's resolutions failed each year. Maybe my resolutions should've included "unresolving" as well. Never mind, in with the new, out with the decrepit. Per Webster's, intention means having something in mind as a plan or design; purpose; direction or orientation of the mind toward an object; aim. I like that. I aim to practice more meditation and yoga this year, that way, if I don't quite make it, I at least intended to. An intention leads us down the path toward a goal. Whether we reach the goal or not should be beside the point. By orienting ourselves towards that path we've already changed our future.
My friend Lee pointed out to me that I'm just lowering my expectations, copping out. I told him he should be glad I lowered my expectations, as it meant he didn't need to live up to mine.
Maybe I did lower my expectations, so what? Perhaps this is the year we all do. Or we just need to shift our expectations. Expecting less money and work equals more free time to do yoga, or call Lee. Or not. He's not expecting my call anyway.