What Did You Learn?

As any substitute teacher knows, we are not always welcomed with open arms. Students of all ages get comfortable with the teaching style and personality of their instructor, and don't always enjoy change. It is summer in Phoenix, which means we are all looking to run away from the heat. Vacation time equals more substitute yoga teachers (after all, we deserve a break too). In the fitness world, yoga students are viewed by many to be the least flexible when it comes to change. Odd, since yoga itself is about flexibility of body and mind! Maybe it is the nature of yoga, a body-mind exercise, that endears yoga students to their teachers. Yoga is also a philosophy, not just physical exercise. I remember every one of my past yoga instructors, as they each opened my spiritual path in some way. I don't, on the other hand, recall many of my past cardio instructors.
As a yoga student myself, even I am disappointed when my favorite teacher is not in the studio. Immediately my defenses come up and inwardly feel the resistance to change bubbling to the surface. My negative self-talk tries to bully its way to my consciousness and convince me to turn around and go home. Aware of this, I push this negativity aside and purposely choose to find one new positive learning experience from that substitute teacher. I usually walk out with at least two great new tidbits, whether it's different ways of teaching a specific pose, learning a new pose, better verbiage or feeling a new breathing technique. It may not be the class I was expecting, but I still came away with something learned.
We always learn something from a new experience, it is what we choose to learn that makes up our character.

Shaken, But Not Stirred

It's 6AM in Pelham, NY and I am shaken awake. As I unfog my mind, the guest bed I lie in continues to quake beneath me. I hop out and dart into the darkened hallway, bewildered. My hosts are already there, staring strangely out the second story window. They seem frightened, and now, so am I. A bomb has hit NYC, they blurt out. My eyes, still adjusting to the dimness of the hour, strain out the window expecting an afterglow or anything to validate their wildly insane statement. Nothing. I slowly reply that I think an earthquake just jolted us out of bed. By their looks, they seem to think that's crazier than a bomb! It turns out my first earthquake occurred in NY of all places. I was in Manhattan for four days back in 1985 and experienced an earthquake. Go figure!
When your foundation is being rocked, how do you keep from losing your footing? What do you hang on to when the ground beneath you is shifting, as it did that memorable dawn in Pelham? Finding a safe center and solid ground is not always possible out there, yet always available within each and every one of us. We just may have to reach deep down into that well of inner strength and grab a big handful. What is in your well? Prayer? Meditation? Deep spirituality? If you are not sure, these unsteady times may be when you discover what your core is made of.
Best of all, earthquakes don't last forever.

Gong Your Way to Meditation

For those who don't know me, my husband and I own a real estate company in Phoenix, AZ. Yes, the battleground for foreclosures, seemingly bottomless falling home values and 110+ degree heat. If you wonder how I keep my sanity, it's meditation all the way baby! What flavor of meditation? All of them!! I listen to Tibetan bowls and Indian gongs, move my stagnant chi (energy) with qigong and practice my own brand of wicked yoga till I drop. Meditation comes in many forms, from auditory to kinetic (moving). Review my older posts on meditation and breathing to pick up a few tricks.

When I am in need of a supercharged meditation session, I reach for gong meditation music or Tibetan bowls. It is powerful and effective. Attending a live session is a great way to experience this music, also. To begin, lay down on the ground so the vibrations of the sounds reverberate through you. Crank the music as loud as you can (without the neighbors freaking out) and focus on the furthest away sound. Let the music permeate through you like water filtering through sand and slow down your breathing pattern. If the music is distracting, as it may be for beginners, center your attention on your breath. View this as an exercise in both self-restraint and growth. Start with 20 minutes and work your way up to the entire CD, usually an hour. You may notice your muscles twitching, this is normal. These sounds act like a tuning fork on the body, and the twitching is your body's method of realigning your energy. To learn more about sound healing, go to http://www.healingsounds.com/. I feel peace and joy seeping out of every cell in my body after these intense sessions, a much needed respite from the world.

Stop Dealing Drugs

to your family, friends, acquaintances and strangers. NOT those kinds of drugs, we are talking about emotional addicts and how we enable them. My definition of addiction is simple: something you can't stop. Every time someones becomes angry, the hypothalamus in the brain produces chemicals to be released into the bloodstream. The problem with an addict, is he always wants more. So, a person addicted to anger will conjure up situations (whether real or imagined) to trigger the emotional "hit" they need. We, as enablers, allow the person to trigger a reaction out of us that will give them the hit they seek. Ever wonder why some people pick fights out of nowhere? Why some people always have drama in their life? View a short video on emotional addiction.
I have a couple of questions I ask myself whenever someone seems to be needing a reaction out of me. What emotional "hit" am I fulfilling for them (anger, frustration, victimization)? Do I want to give them this? If my answer is no, I simply withhold what they need. I don't give them the emotional reaction they are expecting from me. On the contrary, my response is either changing the subject or responding in an objective way that I know won't create that "hit" for them. This usually works, unless it's someone who's been faithfully counting on you as their "drug dealer" for years, like a relative or good friend. Then, it's a little more complicated and will require you to stand strong in your position. At first, the addict will be slightly confused at your new behavior. Then he will try different tactics to cajol that needed reaction out of you. Don't be surprised if he becomes rude, combative or desperate (just like a drug addict). Over time, he will seek someone else to provide the emotional high he needs. Be aware you may lose this relationship if you choose to change your behavior towards them, but you may also be the first step they need to overcome their addiction.
Emotions aren't wrong, they make life more colorful. The important thing to remember is not to allow our emotional states to control us, otherwise we must be addicted to them.